My World

Some people sometimes ask me why I live where I live. Why I don’t use my talents and skills to make career in a city. They cannot understand that I have chosen the place because I like it here.  Because I feel the best here. I love to have my own warm peaceful real home, my beautiful land, loving animals and lots of freedom. I need lots of space and I have it here. I need close contact with nature and I have it here.

Well, it cost lots of hard labour – that’s the price. But I prefer it than easy city life. Besides, the simple labour is rewarding when you see fruits of your efforts, when you create your space around you due to your needs and dreams.

Most people are astonished, that I prefer to live lonely on my own here than being in crowd of people.
But what’s so good about being in the crowd? Many people are lead by low instincts and when you feel it – you don’t feel well in their company. They are like vampires to you. Drain all energy from you. Nature is pure and innocent. Natural. Not harmful. You may rest among nature. Feel good. Most people make me tired. I could stand presence only a very few very good friends. Since years they are far away, busy with their own lives and families. I have learnt to manage and live on my own and I prefer it this way. I doubt if I ever meet someone with whom I could feel happy. I can tolerate others for some time. For example volunteers or CouchSurfers. But I don’t need them really. I could do without them. Volunteers should be welcomed here as people who offer to help me at my farm. But the reality is, that they demand from me extra work – hosting them is for me extra work and expense, teaching and explaining them every simple thing and dealing with them is tiring for me, especially if they tend to be difficult and fussy. Also, often happens, that they make more harm then help which makes me think twice if I should still host them. So, I decided to be more careful whom I invite to my house. I think I don’t want to stretch myself too much. I prefer to host people who are a real help to me – not another burden.

Big Branch

This morning I took the bath and made a breakfast. Before it or while doing it – I fed poultry and dogs and watered them. After bathing I went out to finish making aronia seedlings. I also collected and brought home some pot stands which I washed yesterday and left to dry outside.

A big white car arrived. I went out to see who was it. They were electricians who came to remove stork nest from electric pole in my yard. They came with lift, so by the way I asked them to remove one of disturbing big branches. They were so okay that they agreed to do it and even didn’t want money for it. They only asked me to make order with the stork nest which they made fall down from the pole.

One of the electricians cut down this big branch with his own chainsaw and I needed to cut it into smaller pieces, so asked him to start my chainsaw. He tried a few times and succeed, so I cut off smaller branches from the big branch and started to make order with it, because it was laying in the middle of my inner road in front of my yard making any traffic impossible.

I thanked electricians for the help and they drove away. I was making the order with the branches until I became sweat. The chainsaw is heavy and I am a weak person, so I got tired soon, but managed to make much order with the branches. The engine was still warm and I wanted to go to orchard to cut down some poles, but I was too tired and sweat after making order with these branches in the road. So I went home to rest and drink some milk before I continue with branches.

I am glad I could get rid of this big branch. I few days ago when I was washing the windows at the attic, this branch irritated me since it was covering the view of the inner road and my farm entrance gate. I want to see if someone is coming to my farm, so wanted to cut down the branch but it was too high. Happily it happened today, thanks to the electricians and the lift, so I am happy :)

I need to rest now and then finish making order with the branches...

My new cat Miriam is getting more and more tamed with each day. Today she dared to sit on the other bed while I was lying in my big bed in the bedroom. I go to bed for a while...

Mysterious Plant

I have planted lots of seeds of a mysterious plant. I thought, it was a pumpkin seeds. At least I was told they were pumpkin seeds. But the fruits are not orange nor yellow. They are green. Dark green. And the taste of the fruit is very similar to zucchini, but I think better. The fruit is more soft and delicate. Good for salads and also for hot dishes. And it grows round and big :)

Raised Garden Beds

The day is warm, even very warm. I have washed the study window from outside, because Dakota had licked it trying to kiss me through the window and made it blurred. Now I am making seedlings from aronia and one home plant. I have spread apple seeds in rows of  apple trees in orchard. Exactly: rotten apples with seeds. I hope that at least some of them will grow into trees. Rotten apple is good base of minerals for seeds and for growing young trees.

The apple trees which grow already close to the inner road are looking good. I cut off excessive branches which help the main plant to grow bigger and stronger, so they look better with each day. Also my horses graze around them, but are careful not to destroy the young trees. But I need more of apple trees. 
The apple trees which grow in other orchard, behind the river – are eaten by some kind of animal. I think by deer, because I have seen a couple of spots with pressed grass – big enough for a deer and besides hair wouldn’t reach so high to eat the top of a tree. Recently I have seen 3 young deer nearby. It looks like they got into my orchard. I need to check the fence close to the forest and think about metal wire there or wooden crossbars.

I have made two raised garden beds. One is already finished and filled with fertile soil. I have planted spring onion there and watered it. Now it’s turn for the plant to grow big and dense. It would be very handy to have spring onion just next to the house.

I have milked two goats. The third run away and I need to catch it first. I have put on new earrings to two goats who lost them. I hate the task. It’s unpleasant for me and painful for goats, but European Union orders all farmers to do it. I need to prepare one more pot for aronia seedlings which are still waiting for it. And come back to catch and milk the last goat. It’s already evening. I spent all day outside. It’s still warm and nice. I am tired now. I am working since early morning up to now. I think I need rest and take a bath.

Okay. That’s it. I  have catched the last goat and milked her. It’s already dark. I am so tired that don’t have power to eat, which is actually good. You shouldn’t eat late just before going to bed. I want just go to bed and sleep. I don’t have power to take a bath. The milk for cheese is waiting. I think I have to do it tonight otherwise tomorrow will be too acid. 

Thinking and thinking

I am thinking and thinking today. I need to prepare new farm strategy or focus on continuing what I have started before. I need also make winter supplies. I am busy outside as well doing different things. While I am walking across my land, I am considering different aspects of farming at my land. I need to invest more money in my farm, but I don’t have them. So I am trying to find other solutions which would be able to replace investing money.

I think I need to draw a sketch of plants and animals which I would like to grow and breed. Need to think what I have and what I would like to have here.

I think I should organise my farm production in such way, so it would be possible for me to be independent from external services and goods and external help.

The Daily Duties

I have milked the goats and watered and fed the poultry. I am going to make pudding from the today milk. Now I need to check how are the fruit tress, because it’s warm and dry and I suspect that there is no water in the place where Jeff left them. I need also cut down some more apple branches, but before it – need to prepare another pots with soil for them. 

Well, the plants Jeff left are still in water, but don’t look too good. Probably, because their roots were heavily damaged. I think it’s time to plant them. So after first rains I am going to plant them.

I have started to make a dinner. This time my favourite chicken. Baked chicken of course :)
I am also cooking żurek and pudding. It’s sunny outside, I would like to do something there. I have started building flower and herb beds from bricks and good soil.

My beautiful horses are grazing politely in their meadow. They are wonderful creatures. After dinner I will go to bring them some apples. They love them.

My Own Natural Yoghurt!

It seems that yoghurt is well done. Consistence looks great. It needs to cool down and then rest a few hours in a fridge. Then it will be good to try it.
I hope it is tasty! :) I have made 16 jars with the yoghurt. 13 little ones and 3 bigger. I though it would be more handy to make the yoghurt already in jars.
I used for this purpose a small ceramic jars which initially were designed to be used as containers for spices. I have bought a lot of them some time ago, so now they are just perfect for making and keeping yoghurt. I am very curious about the taste, but need to wait. But consistence is very good: dense and creamy. The bread is also okay. I have eaten breakfast consisting from my home made food: home baked bread and sliced boiled eggs. Yolks looked wonderful. Very orange. Now it’s time to feed poultry, dogs, cat and milk goats. A friend of mine is coming today to visit me, so I need to milk the goats before he comes.

Okay. I have tasted the yoghurt :) It IS good :))) Even better than original.
So from now on I am going to do it more often... :)

Slow Food

Why slow food? Because you move slow while making it? Because you are slow after eating this? Or because you need time to make it? :) - Of course, because you need much labour and time to make it. As I am busy farmer overloaded with too much daily duties, I don’t do slow food every day, but I try to do it sometimes. Today I am making 3 slow foods: goat cheese, goat yoghurt, bread. So tomorrow I should have at least fresh bread and yoghurt. The cheese needs more time. I have 11 eco eggs, so tomorrow maybe scrambled eggs with dill and lettuce? Or onion? I will see. Tomorrow I would like to make at least two flower beds for pink rose bushes. And maybe one for spring onion. I got inspired of new website I spotted. They do there so much beautiful things. Beautiful, wise, artistic. I like it. I think I will arrange nicely the new planned flower beds in front of the house. In next year I expect to have here young rose bushes.

In search of winter supplies

I am tired! I went for a bike trip to find straw, hay, potatoes and grain for the winter. The bike chain fell down a couple of times, so I had to walk the bike. I did around 15km. I came back with some grain for hens and small, but valuable shopping: oat flakes ;) and yoghurt which I am going to use to make my own yoghurt. How to make yoghurt? Where is google??? I need to use it. I have forgotten the yoghurt making procedure and need to refresh my memory. I haven’t been doing yoghurt for ages... But, I still have thermometer which still works, so it is a good start. I will need it to measure milk temperature. Okay, I have found some recipes. Time to get to goats and bring the fresh milk... ;) 

Cat Visibility

Cat visibility is constantly growing. I spotted her more than several times now. She is gaining more courage and is hunting wildly which is great thing. She was very noisy last night in the kitchen. It seems, that with each day there is less and less rodents here. That’s good. But I am sure she will have here a full time job for all autumn and winter, since rodents like to hide themselves in warm places during cold months, so they will be storming my house in the coming weeks and months. I have here also some winter supplies which attract rodents even more. I think I will bring one more hunter here :)

The Pumpkin Soup

I don’t have to eat every day a chicken (although I would like to :))) ), so I have decided to cook a pumpkin soup. It is already good, 5 minutes more and the soup will be ready... :) I can’t wait to eat it... Tastes good! :)

The soup was good. I think tomorrow I will eat the same. I am sleepy again. I need to rest a while and then I will try to do what I planned to do today. Maybe desert? I have got two puddings in the fridge. 

Mares had escaped. I managed to bring back two of them. Still the youngest is outside my orchard. This case is more hard. I need rope this time. My tricks which worked with two other mares doesn’t work with the youngest.
I need to use force this time. So I came back home to change shoes and find a rope.

Okay. The foal is back in the orchard. But it was not an easy task. However I didn’t have to use force. First I tried persuasion, then one of my techniques. Eventually I made the foal to come back. I am tired. I had to walk a lot chasing the foal. I also corrected the neighbour’s fence, but this part of the fence is totally rotten and broken, there is no current. I secured that part with a tape, but it’s not enough. It needs to be repaired better. This part needs new logs and wire. 

When I was coming home the neighbour’s son arrived on his quad. I yelled to him, that the fence is gone. He didn’t respond. Either he didn’t hear or he is wild. I am not sure. He was hidden behind bushes around 200 metres away from me. I started to walk into his direction wanting to tell him that this part of fence is broken, but when I approached him closer – he drove away.

I brought additional tape and cut off the vulnerable part of the fence from the rest of the orchard. I hope it will be enough to prevent horses against breaking into there. But this vulnerable part of fence has to be replaced with new logs and wire. Also in repaired part of fence should be current. Today no current. The neighbour is keeping here his huge herd of cattle and current should be on. I don’t want his cows to get into my orchard and destroy my fruit trees.

I went to hug mares that they are so politely grazing in my orchard. Especially the oldest mare is doing here good job. I think she reads in my thoughts :) I have given them some apples, big hugs and kisses. 

It’s already 8 p.m. Time to bed. I am tired. Maybe I will have a cup of tea only. Oh, I should have my special herbal tea against menstruation pains... Tomorrow... I will try to survive today without it. I feel strange, but not so bad like recently.

Cat Miriam

The cat allowed me to see her twice this morning. She emerged twice from behind my cupboards in the study.

This time she was close to my face and looked for a while at me. Directly into my eyes. I wanted to touch her, but also didn’t want to scare her. I let her to take her time with her taming. But it’s progress :) I am glad. She will learn soon that there is no need to be afraid of me. I am her best friend.

It seems that it is going to rain. I need to walk outside to do something before it’s raining.

I washed two windows at the attic. I washed them not, because I expect volunteers here or any other guests. I washed them for myself. I think I should start doing more for myself. For my own comfort and pleasure. The view from the windows is amazing. I like to listen to the wind whispering among leafs of trees growing in front of the house from the south. The Sun appeared. I washed the windows and need a rest now. My forces today are frail. I need to save them and manage them carefully. I think I will make lunch from young pumpkin. No rush today please... I don’t have to build a pyramid today. I may enjoy every moment of this day in slow pace, doing minor things. Nothing exhausting today.

Between Dreams

I fight with my overwhelming somnolence. I think I need to slow down and stop demanding from myself so much. I am overworked and overtired. Days are long enough, but I need more and more breaks before each task. I need to rest often. I feel like a bear who fell asleep in it’s winter dream. I am not well physically today. So I have decided to work only a bit, just basic and simple things. Nothing too heavy. I need to prepare for the winter, but also need to do it in slower pace than I planned.

I also think about the people who came to my farm this year. Some of them were eager to pull out from me personal information only to use them against me. It taught me stop sharing with them this. I think it would be wiser not to talk about myself, my problems and my life and my matters. Most people don’t deserve your trust.

For example pressed by Jeff I reluctantly told him how much I paid for my farm. The day when he was leaving my farm he told me something stupid: “I could buy your farm and even a few farms like yours. I am rich enough for it”. Well, I didn’t share my personal information about my farm to hear something like that. Besides, he was wrong. The price I paid for the farm 10 years ago was good deal for me then, but right now, if I would like to sell the farm – I would get easily 20 times more. The prices changed a lot during last 10 years, not mentioning, that the price I have negotiated 10 years ago was real occasion, because at that time no-one was interested in buying this farm and the owner was in a hurry, so he was happy to sell the farm for any money. Estate market changed a couple years later after I moved here. Poland joined EU and land prices went suddenly up. And still are climbing. They will be climbing till 2016 when they will get their peak.

                                           One of mine beautiful natural ponds...

So, if I would like to sell my farm in 2016 year, I would make much more money on it then now. But I don’t want to sell it. It’s my home. My chosen place in the world. I sacrificed 10 years of my life and hard labour working on my land and trying to survive here. I am not going to sell it. Never. And such commercial approach as Jeff presented was in my opinion rude or at least arrogant. I felt it was rude. I hosted him for 10 days. He was my guest. And saying something like that it was rude. I need to be more careful whom I invite to my house. But it’s difficult to know it before you meet people. Strangers always try to present themselves in good light from distance. They promise great help, but when they come to your place they often are becoming a hard work to you, another burden. 

My natural pond... I love this place :) Ir's magic!

I wish I could renovate the house till the end and could start renting rooms for money. I have enough of dealing with some difficult to deal with tourists who pretend to be volunteers. They can be a real nuisance for you. Better to leave the work for skilled professionals and start to charge tourists for their stays at my farm. Right now it is not possible, because the renovation is still not finished. But I hope that in next year it will be possible.

The new cat let me see her this morning :) She was behind the cupboard in my study. Probably she was chasing there mice. That’s good. She has a lot of job to do in the house.  

Tired, But Prolific

I am very tired today, but also very prolific :) I have just created 7 new websites :)
Now they need to be developed and to grow.

In the morning I was really tired. I woke up, ate breakfast, took a bath and went to bed again. I was resting or sleeping till late morning or rather noon. Then I got up and went to feed poultry, milk the goats.

In so called meantime I managed to write two letters and created 7 new websites.
I also got an interesting recipe how to make a nutella from plum jam :)
It’s already evening. I need to rest a while and if I have some power, I will wash windows in the attic.

A Sunny Tuesday

It’s late morning, but I woke up at night around 2.30, so it’s okay :) I had right to sleep longer.
The hunting cat awoken me at night. She was chasing mice in my bedroom and it made me wake up.
Now she is again invisible. It’s annoying, when your own cat hides before you, but she is new here, this is why she is so shy. Anyway, a few years ago when I got a first cat she was well tamed and not hiding before me at all. Kreska was friendly cat from the start. She was wonderful cat and excellent hunter. And so pleasant and nice to me from the start. Last week new cat seemed to be tamed, but she is scared of the new place and hiding still. She doesn’t show up at all. I know she needs more time to get tamed, but anyway it’s annoying. 

I went upstairs to see how the attic looks like. Jeff did there good job, but still it needs to be finished. Anyway, less job than before. I found my machine for making yoghurt. Now I need to find the little glass jars for it and then I would be able to make yoghurt again. Jeff likes yoghurt. Maybe some of my new guests would like eat yoghurt as well. For breakfast I have eaten oat flakes with goat milk and sliced banana. I made some order at staircase to the attic. It’s nice, sunny weather, so I would like to wash windows in the attic. Then milking goats. No. I need fresh air first and goats should be milked in the morning. So first goats.

Well, first I have watered and fed poultry and dogs, because they are much closer and the task was quick. Now I am heading to the goats meadow and by the way I am going to check if the fence around orchard is okay, but it looks that it is okay, because my beloved horses are grazing politely in the orchard. They do there good job with cutting grass short and precisely around the young trees. They are excellent helpers.

Well, I have milked the goats and checked a fence. It’s already a lunch time, but I am not hungry and don’t need to cook anything new, since I have dinner which I cooked yesterday. I think I will make only fresh salad to it. And pudding for the desert. The new cat received the fresh milk as well, but she doesn’t show up. It’s nice, sunny weather – I am going to cut some excessive apple branches and make some new seedlings from them.

I have eaten baked chicken with young potatoes and dill. I have cut some excessive apple branches and also aronia and made seedlings from them. I hope they will grow well. It’s already evening. I am tired and sleepy. Time to go to bed.

The Heavenly Oats!

I have milked the goats and prepared oat flakes with goat milk and bananas... mmmmmmmm....
It was marvelous! Moon Beans would be happy to tast it ;)))


Gee... I am so sleepy... time to dream! :)

A Sunny Monday

Beautiful day today. At last I could sleep back in my biggest bed :) I feel good today. 

Early in the morning I visited poultry and watered them, gave them food. I went to goats meadow to see how the goats are and to switch them. Horses are grazing obediently in the orchard.  

I need to finish making seedlings and wash the dishes.

Okay. I have washed the dishes and made the seedlings. I also made list of things to do. Time to start cook dinner (or lunch due to western customs).

I have made a delicious luncherodinner :) Before it I went to the village shop to buy potatoes and by the way I found there oats and bananas, so I am very happy about it, because I don’t need to go to Olecko to buy oats :)
So, tomorrow morning oats with goat milk and bananas... niammmm.... :)

I am happy I got back my personal space in my house :) It was quite an interesting experience hosting here all those volunteers, but I am already tired with it and want to rest from strangers... Also I need to prepare to the winter well. I have ordered 200kg potatoes for the winter time. Need to buy straw and make the windows to the stable. Need to make wood for the winter. Plant trees. Make a fence and lots of lots of other things. I will do only the most urgent things and rest will need to wait until next year, or until the next proper volunteers.

Jeff spent 10 days here. He was very hardworking, but toilet which he repaired stopped working at all.
Also washing machine still doesn’t work. Order in the attic is still not finished. Only the trees which he dig up are okay and ready to be planted. And his bedroom and bathroom are clean. 

There are always pluses and minuses of the volunteering. Now I want to have my house only for myself at least for some time. No volunteers, no stresses, no obligations. Absolute peace of mind :) I feel - I need it :)

Well, I may host here guests similar to me. I mean open minded, tolerant and friendly.

A Fight with Local Mafia

I was just happily having bath trying to relax after hard work of the last weeks, when local Masurian Mafia arrived wanting money from me. I said “NO!” and they started to yell at me and trying to threaten me. And I returned them the yelling as well and took some photos of them standing in my yard and recorded their threats with my mobile phone. I told them to get lost from my land immediately and if not, I would call the police. We yelled at each other for over a quarter of minutes. I was wet standing in the middle of my yard wrapped only in a towel and with wet hair. When I finished yelling, I was already dry :) So much fun in the sunny Sunday evening ;)
Eventually they left noisily my yard using klaxon at the car they arrived. I told them, that if anything will be missing from my field, they will be suspected first. I have them on the pics! I have evidence of their raid!

A Note of Sadness

I am not sad, but it is sad that we couldn’t create long friendship. The thing is, that he didn’t really mean “a friendship” but “a long term relationship” and this one didn’t work. I feel a kind of note of sadness, but from the other side much relief. The moment he left my farm I got back my good mood. I prefer my freedom much more than being tangled up in a tiring, unhappy relationship. Maybe it means that I will stay single till the last day of my life. Maybe. But I prefer that than being trapped in an unhappy relationship.

I went to the orchard to check if the gate was shut well and coming back I cut down some apple branches intending to make seedlings from them. 

I have returned home and decided to take a long bath. I need relax!

The Winter Supplies

It’s time to start making winter supplies. I have bought 50kg of flour which is not enough for all the winter, but at least something for a start. 50kg flour means 50 loafs of breads. For one person this is enough bread for 100 days, or a bit more. If I continue to feed volunteers, I will need twice as much flour, also twice as much rise, sugar, potatoes and other food. 

The empty beer tins - the souvenirs Jeff has left at my farm :) I hanged them at fence wire and switched on the current. The tins make some noise while moving with wind so are hearable at dark night and are much better visible for horses during the day than the wire. Thanks to the noise, at night the horses know where is the gate and can avoid it. Also the smell of bear helps them to locate the gate.

At noon Jeff said he decided to go to Warsaw. So he decided to leave my farm. Well, he was great helper, very hardworking, good man, clean and honest. But unfortunately too bitter with everyday as he was disappointed I didn’t want him. What can I do? Sometimes I fall in love and sometimes I don’t. This time unfortunately I didn’t fall in love. When I am not in love, I don’t sleep with an accidental man. I am not a hippie woman at all ;) I am rather Puritan lady ;) Very strict about this things. No love – no sex. That’s it :) So he was angry with me with each day more and more and it was tireding to me more and more. He became aggressive and quarrelsome. It was not nice. Although I am very grateful to him for his help, I didn’t feel good having him around. Maybe this is why I felt so drained from energy. The situation was making me more tired. I have got lots of work at my farm and any additional stress is not good for me.