Friday 21 September 2012

Mistake?


I am all in tears. They took away one of my dogs. It’s because of that two bloody lesbians. The enemies. Traitors. Dog Satja gave birth today and was very thin after that. Vet inspectors who suddenly came today asked me what I am going to do with the puppies. I didn’t know. I cannot afford buying so much food for so many dogs. They assured me that the dog and her babies will have great care and lots of food in the shelter. I have enough food for two dogs, but not for nearly 10. Vet visit was surprise to me. I was so confused. I agreed first to give away the dog because of her numerous puppies. Before she was taken I gave her a big bowl of milk, fresh bread and a pot of jam because gas is over and I couldn’t cook rise today.

The car from shelter came. There was nothing inside for puppies transportation. I was afraid that they will die during the transport. The dog started to bring babies outside the car. She didn’t want to go! :( Suddenly I felt sorry for her. She didn’t want to go! Here is her home! I started to cry. But I had signed the papers. I had agreed to give them away. I had to give them away now... The men who came to take the dogs said, that she will be adopted for sure, because she is lovely. I know she is lovely. I told them that I want her back after she will feed babies. In two months. She is in Giżycko now. In the shelter. I don’t have a car. It will be problem for me to go there and bring her back. Maybe I shouldn’t give her away? Maybe I should keep her here while she is feeding puppies? But what with the puppies after two months when they grow big and bigger? This all happened too quick. I didn’t have time to think it over. The vets, exactly one female vet who was enchanted by my horses urges very much on issuing papers for my youngest horses. They will be described and will get passports soon. Horses, goats, poultry, the other dog and cat are fine. Very fine. The vet inspectors have written this in their protocol. Satja also was fine, but after giving the birth was very thing. I didn’t know that she was pregnant. She should get twice as much food than the other dog. And she should eat medicine against worms. Now I have just one dog. The most aggressive one. Very good defending dog. Satja was too mild. Too calm. Maybe let her be adopted by someone from a city? She would have good, warm place to live and lots of good food. Here she had freedom. Here was her home. But my dogs were fighting with each other. Maybe let her be adopted by someone from a city? If she will be missing me, maybe she will run away and come back to me? If she will, I will not let her to be taken away never again. 

I am still in emotional shock. I am still confused. I don’t know if they did right thing taking her away from me. I am not sure if I did right thing letting them to do it. I am totally confused. Now I think that I have 3 litre of milk everyday, rise supplies for next couple of months – enough to feed the dog mum and even her babies. But what later to do with the puppies when they became dogs? At shelter at least they have shelter and lots of food. The shelter is financed by county or state and they can afford to feed all dogs very well. But I feel I did mistake. I shouldn’t let them take her away :((( I am so sorry now... :((( I am shaking now...

Voices


Since some days, I don’t know exactly from when because I didn’t pay much attention to it – I hear new voices.
I thought it was a bird singing. But recently I have learnt that beavers also make such birdlike noises. They whistle. So this sound which I am hearing maybe is just beaver’s whistling? I could see many beaver’s traces in the grass. It looks like my beavers are very active and are able to come very near my settlement. 
Right now I am also hearing a whistling... Very close to the house... It looks like they are everywhere...
I feel a little bit like surrounded by zombies :) Beavers come up only at night. And it’s night. Very late night.
The biggest beaver can have even up to 140cm length. It would be scary to meet such one in my yard at night ;)